scream

You know that feeling - when u think u will miss out if someone puts a plate of great food infront of u & u think u should eat till ur content ! Well I beat it . Healthy eating in terms of PORTION control is starting to happen to me.!

Wow - i went to my wedding and ate reasonably on starters - though if i followed by eating pangs - i would have ate 3 times as much. BUT NO is refused more, i said i got the main course to follow - again I ate reasobaly & had only one portion of desert.

It was great - maybe my habits have started to change - finally - my thick skull has got in to its head - it ok to leave food & not eat everything in front of u!

5 days out of 7 I go for an hours walk - 2 help the weight loss or maintain. A few nights ago, I was out with a one of my friends. It was dark, about 9pm, we were walking alongside a main road, as we were talking my friend shouted owch, something hit me, something hit the back of my bum. What ! I looked and realized the car that had gone past at 20-30 mph, had chucked an egg at my friends bum, it hit, it hurt, it broken & fell to the ground & some had splattered on to me!! It was so annoying - why did someone do that?  Was it racially motivated  - how could it be ? it was dark? Was it just some one being stupid? I dont know it bothers me, we have not been on that route again - but its bothers me these stupid people & there behaviour. Needless to say I end up cursing after them.

http://www.jenniferhawthorne.com/articles/change_your_thoughts.html = check it out . Its true = if its a negative tho8 - recognize it & ignore it. If its a positive thought hold on to it  like gold dust ! Act on it ! I am trying to. INstead of saying I wont junk out tonight say I will eat reasonable tonight , over and over again = it works.

Today I awoke , & decided  Ive come full circle in everything = try that , dont that  etc etc . Decided to start afresh, keep the good out with the poor..! I set my cooking timer or 10 minutes ( i have a little clock by my bed) & JUMped Rope for 10 minutes = same about 3-400 turns , was better, less stops this is my second wk & at the end of it I am breathless. People make sure u stretch out or legs will feel stiff.

Last night just before bed , I did 60 crunches, 40 sit ups, 30 back arm sit up ( cant remember the name ), 30 leg raises & also tried a hand stand - stage 1 nearly there. It felt good.

Lots of thoughts felt lousy = one of the 80% bummer thoughts - f them. I will concentrate on the positive like, ppl I know care, r just busy or stuck inthere own 80% of lousy thoughts.

I will get out of this rut, act more productive, enjoy more. I also asked god for blessing - sign of desperation - yeah , i’m not afraid to admit it. Its true, while i have a roof over my head, food on my table, ppl who care, laughs here and there = it just doesnt seem to be enough. AM I  being self pitiful or even in this train of thought self-gratifying. I dont know - i think of the bleak , ppl living in wars, or poverty - real - poverty to tell myself I am blessed =  problem is where i live - i am pretty much at the top of the bottom of ’successful’ stakes & i can seem to escape it . Escape what - measuring myself against it, knowing I have fallen way short of my potential. Im struggling to start again - and thats why im not satisfied happy- does this not make sense. Why would it its recurring tho8s that haunt my head not yours.

wish u all well - who ever reads this .x

Its not working - the evenings - when i rummage through the kitchen eating too much of good and bad stuff = over eating! Funny aint it - from breakfast through to 6ish Im fine - i eat regular and little through the day - once the evening hits I eat loads. It is my downfall & enough of the lax attitude = ive decided to set my self some sensible rules - i must stick to for a month to get this bear under control!  Any advice welcomed,x

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=41280 Check this out! For the last wk now - every morning I get up - i set my alarm for 10 minutes & i attempt to jump rope ! I manage about 3-400 turns - in between stopping ! It is the sure weight to get fit, & fast apparantly once u work your way up to jumping rope continously for 10 minutes it is the equivalent of 30 minute run…! learn the basic move to dancing with it - 10 minutes a day - is nothing over the wk its an hour or so workout - easily fitted into ur routine.Anyone going to give this a go with me -! come on buddies!

While i havent reached my weight goals - I can say that I have a pair of fat pants - trousers from 8 years ago - that wear too tight to wear then but fit fine now . That something I am happy with . x